I am not an angel nor a saint, nor am I a devil with red wings and a tail
Neither are you.
You and I are “just” human beings.
We sin and fail, sometimes miserably. We make mistakes, errors and blunders and probably still will.
This is life in its full package.
We hide the guilt that oozed from those slips, stumbles and likes in a bag that we carry religiously wherever we go, our head hidden between our shoulders, beating ourselves up and sentencing our lives to a non-ending misery. “I deserve to feel the guilt, it was my doing, my fault”, you might tell yourself.
That was my inner conversation too, when I didn’t know any better, but it’s different now.
It wasn’t the “me” that I am now who did those things.
Allow me to explain.
Do you know that, at the cellular level, the “You” that you are now, isn’t the “You” that you were back then?
Here are the scientific facts.
The renewal of your blood cells, your organ tissues, including the cells that take the longest to get replaced – your bones cells- is counted in days, weeks and months only, and although it takes 7 to 10 years for your whole skeleton to be renewed entirely, your bone cells are replaced on an ongoing process.
Now you know
Cell by cell, the You of the past that acted in a way you felt guilty about, isn’t the person you are now.
Now you have the proof.
It wasn’t You, now, who did it. Physiologically.
Spiritually and mentally, at that time, you knew less about life than you do now.
Do you agree that if you knew better, you would have done better, decided better, chosen better?
Now, when you think about it, is it fair to look down at your younger self and play the judge, or the executioner even?
Guilt is an emotion that lowers the body’s bioenergy and prevents the immune system from functioning at its best. It leaves your body unprotected against germs and illnesses. How will you be able to do better in life if your health is compromised?
Moreover, feeling the guilt won’t change anything to what happened.
Here is what can help you do better in the future
If you can fix things, do it now.
If you can’t, accept that you can’t and apologise if appropriate.
Allow yourself to learn from your past experiences.
Forgive yourself genuinely with the firm belief that you will do better in the future and move on with your life.
You cannot change the past, but you can learn from it and change how you feel about it.
I am really trying to move on, but it really hurts?
I lost many people around me and that what made me doubt on myself.. may be am the bad one
Thank you Marwa for your comment 🙂
If we allow ourselves to see life under a new light, from a place where there is no good or bad, but instead see it as life experiences, opportunities to learn more about ourselves and grow, that there is nothing to forgive even, I am sure things will look different.
Remember that it takes only a second to.. decide now to accept what is and move on.
Much love and blessings <3
Beautifully expressed Leila, very true. It must be that common themes waft through the corridors of the collective consciousness. I also shared this on another platform, earlier in the week:
“We die and are re-born in each moment. Whoever we were and our past experience will not come to us again. We are constantly changing, pulsing with life. We are forever reinventing ourselves, moment to moment.”
Thank you for the work you do helping others to lighten their load.
Thank you Stephanie for your wonderful feedback. We definitely get to choose to start afresh each time we face a challenge and get reborn more knowledgeable and wiser, at least a tiny bit. The most important is to accept ourselves no matter what, forgive ourselves first and truly move on on our life’s path, stronger and determined to do better.