It’s rare when I have family visits as we live on different continents, and when I do, we make the most of our time together.
My brother visited lately while on a work trip and when time came for him to leave, it happened suddenly. He had to pack up fast, get ready and rush to the airport with just enough time to reach.
I knew the way, but the roads get a bit confusing close to the airport and I needed to turn on the GPS. Little did I know that my phone battery was almost flat, and the car charger wasn’t there. My brother had an old one with him which we tried, but it didn’t connect and so the problem remained unchanged.
The road was clear, we were having a nice chat, and as soon as we got closer to the airport the traffic slowed down. It was the evening rush hour and without the GPS we started to panic. We had already missed an exit and lost precious minutes.
The more we waited the more the worry increased, but there wasn’t much to do. I remembered then that there are things in life which are not within our control and that we cannot influence nor change in any way.
So I took a few deep breaths to calm my frantic heartbeats and to relax my body as much as possible. The only things I was in control of at that moment, and at any given moment, were my thoughts and consequently, how I felt.
I decided to fully accept the situation and any results it will bring, to focus on the road and create a relaxed ambience until we reach our destination. Everything changed instantly, not the situation, but my perception of it. It was liberating.
Minutes later, my brother and I finally reached the airport safely. He was able to check in just minutes before the counter closed, we said our good-byes and he left.
In any given situation, we always have the choice between 3 possible attitudes: resist, change or accept.
Resist, and the situation will sit at the center of your life, stirring negativity increasingly, hijacking your attention, draining your energy and productivity.
Change it, if you can change anything in it. Do your best and the situation will change. That can bring your way the desired results, get you closer to achieve them or at least gift you the satisfaction to have contributed with the means available to you at that moment, until you can do even better.
Accept the situation as it is if you cannot change anything in it now or even at a later stage, and embrace the inner peace you allow yourself to feel.
There are situations like this one that reminds us that as much as we want to believe that we are in control of everything in our lives, the truth is that we are not.
We are not in control of other people, road traffic, politics, weather conditions …etc., hence, we cannot change them. We can, in some instances, influence them to a certain extent, but we can only control our own actions, words, feelings and attitude and we can only do our best with the means we have at any given moment.
Know and understand what you can change and what you cannot, then wholeheartedly accept what you cannot change. This will bring you inner peace and save you unnecessary stress and negativity.
The article is so well written and reminds me of the things I can control. Loved it!!
What we can control, we can change and that’s great.
What we can’t control, we can’t change, hence it’s best to accept, or remove ourselves from the situation if it generates heavy emotions.
True wisdom. Sometimes we think how possibly we can accept something that crushes us, but little we know that certain challenges are our turning points, our inner growth. Well written, Leila.
Thank you Ana 🙂
Accepting is a foundational step, either to get ready to change the situation, when possible, or if it’s not within our ability to change it, to acknowledge that it’s still part of our life. We then soften our attitude towards it, which makes it fade away from our conscious awareness. We will then be able to nurture what’s good for us instead of nurturing what’s not.
I hope it makes sense 😉
your words reach straight to the heart
Thank you Aida 🙂
talking to the heart as the same time as soul